Why do men like to be caged; to help a wife understand?

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Re: Why do men like to be caged; to help a wife understand?
« Reply #60 on: February 27, 2022, 05:32:16 AM »
Dear Sluts, Slaves, Trainees and Keyholders,
I was not sure whether to add this into my “New to being a keyholder” post or start a new chat.  Clearly, I decided on the latter and have done this to keep the conversations separate and, hopefully, easier to follow.  If you are new to my posts then it might help to read the aforementioned ‘chat’ as it will put this conversation into better context.

I need your advice about why my husband wants, in fact needs, to be caged and punished.

In the initial stages of my hubby exploring chastity, he locked himself up, for quite some time without telling me.  It was only during lock down 1 that he had the courage to tell me, which I applaud him for as he clearly was struggling with his sexual needs at the time.  During the early stages I was just aware of when he was locked but as time went on he asked me to be his keyholder.  I found this very strange and still cannot understand why he needs me to be the KH.  I welcome your views on that one 
Being his KH progressed into role play and, more recently, the role play has become a way of life.  Even when he is out of his cage, I find that I am more commanding and stricter on him than earlier on in our marriage.  He also responds to this and is so much more attentive and interesting to be around; he actually shares his thoughts more.
What I don’t understand is why he accepts the punishments.  I know that he can relieve himself, even when caged, but he seems to not want to.  I have asked him for his view on the matter and I am not convinced that he fully understands the need to be dominated or why he accepts the punishments so willingly.  Let’s be candid, I have been getting quite cruel recently and sense that he still wants more!
Hubby has said that:
1. His work life is so intense and he has so many responsibilities, being a slave is relaxing for him
2. When caged his hormone levels build up and the cage is a constant reminder that he shouldn’t relieve himself without my permission.  For him, this is constant joy!
3. That, as he has got older, he sometime suffers from ED and being a servant to me, without the use of his manhood, means he can still enjoy the passion of pleasing me without the guilt of being a disappointment in bed (something that I have never berated him for)
I am struggling to understand whether I am being unkind to him with the punishments and could in fact be reinforcing his lack of libido?
What are your views, self-reflection and great wisdom that you can share with me?

Yours truly and bemused,
Mistress Dominique xx

Hello Ma'am,

As far as I'm concerned, I like knowing that the keyholder takes pleasure in frustrating me..

 The more she takes pleasure, the more I like it.  Especially if she lets go of her sadistic side by teasing me or humiliating me, showing me her own pleasure with a sextoy or a lover knowing that after that I myself would be unable to provide myself with equivalent pleasure.

I like to feel the desperation to enjoy gradually rising and overwhelming me until I'm almost mad.  crying, begging for a release that won't come because that's when the Keyholder decides to double my sentence...
Just because she can...
Just because it amuses her and it's  excites her...

The more the Keyholder is cruel, the more I like it.

 Even if in a burst of utter cruelty she decided that I should become unable to get a hard-on and my cock should shrink I would be happy to be the object of her cruelty.

Oh of course I will beg her to abandon her disastrous project because I know that once this point is reached there is no reason to release my cock since the cock has become totally useless...

 I know that by admitting this publicly  I take the risk that a particularly cruel Keyholder could be tempted and decide to do it at all costs...
If it were to happen, I would accept it since I like it's cruelty...

I would surely regret every day  to have accepted but a part of me would still be happy to be the toy of a Keyholder even more cruel than in my wildest dreams
« Last Edit: February 27, 2022, 05:55:36 AM by infonitelockee »

Re: Why do men like to be caged; to help a wife understand?
« Reply #61 on: May 23, 2022, 03:00:38 PM »
I recall when I first brought up the idea of chastity as well as other accompanying ideas, there were barriers to break down for not just me, but her too.  The notion of anal play with a strap on initially was a barrier for her, but then once things are given a shot they quickly break down and you realise it's all rather silly. 

With regards to the 'why'.  Personally it's probably more mental than physical.  The physical becomes much MUCH more intense when permitted and that is worth the suffering, whilst the mental is almost overpowering sometimes in terms of levels of desire for your partner.  I think it elevates every aspect of a sexual relationship in all honesty.