New to being a keyholder

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New to being a keyholder
« on: October 28, 2020, 01:19:51 PM »
Hello all,

I need your advice as I am new to being a keyholder and have only trialled a small number of devices.
I have been trying to train my partner but he stills keeps escaping from his cage. I have tried different devices and though he can't get his balls out he still manages to wiggle his penis out! One device is metal and appears very secure but I saw him get some oil on his finger, wiggle it between his scrotum and penis and out it popped! Obviously there was punishment but this is annoying me and is defeating the purpose of the device. Can you recommend a cage which simply can't be wriggled out? Piercing is a last resort but there must be something out there that keeps me in control and him nicely tucked away.

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Offline CuckAlucard

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Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #1 on: November 01, 2020, 06:31:34 PM »
Piercing is definitely the end all certain way to stop it, i have found my mature metal jailbird pretty secure but i never actually tried to escape it before.

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #2 on: November 02, 2020, 11:12:50 AM »
Thank you, I will have a look at that cage.  Currently trialling a new one called the Bondage Locker which has a piercing option.  Having discussed his naughtiness of escaping, my sub is now considering my proposal of a piercing.  We will have to do a little research on that first though as I don't want to upset his 'functionality'...  If you have any advice on this then that will be gratefully received.

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #3 on: November 30, 2020, 03:01:08 AM »
I got my PA for the same issue.
Also........you could put a small(piercing grade?) padlock like I have.  So even when he’s not in chastity he will be reminded of who he belongs to.

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #4 on: January 22, 2021, 06:55:44 PM »
So, several months on and a few hiccups along the way, Covid being one of them, I think that I am getting quite good as a keyholder.  We, as in the royal we, have decided that the naughtiness of escaping from his cage will stop, as it was only spoiling the tension.  Instead, gaps have been built into 'caged time' to cater for our busy lives.  Guilt of escaping has now been replaced by ball aching tension and an occasional, very occasional, time of explosive joy. 
I think that it is time now for my sub to share his view on this matter.  I am hoping that you can share some ideas with me and to him about what the future can look like.
With devilish kisses,
Domonique xxx

"When we first started experimenting with chastity, I think I was a little naïve with the length of time that I could stay caged from day one.  The first couple of hours were exciting, the night was painful/exhausting and the next day inconvenient for work.  Lesson learned here: "Don't jump in!  Instead: lower yourself in slowly and enjoy the slow build of tension over days and weeks."  I discovered all sorts of things about being caged, some functional, some not worth discussing and others incredible.  I knew that I have reached a point of no return about 2 months in.  On a day of no cage, I felt like something was missing, on a psychological level: I wanted to be caged!
Finding the right cage helped: metal for the day and plastic at night.  The metal cage is less obvious under my clothes, even at work, and the weight is teasingly wonderful and, strangely, liberating.  The plastic cage doesn't choke my balls during night time woodies and the pressure on my cock is so...intensely teasing. The best thing of all is when mistress lets me out: my orgasms just go on and on!  I still struggle over the next 2 weeks with feelings of 'this is silly' and 'I can't be bothered' but week 3 arrives and wow, hello aching balls and tingling tension!  If I could go back to a vanilla sex life with the freedom of self-gratification, I would not.  That said, I would like mistress to spice things up now but not sure what to do next as her caged sub?"
Mr Submission

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #5 on: February 01, 2021, 02:17:38 PM »
From Mr Submission (Mistress Dominique has instructed me to write again)
“I managed a new personal record of being continuously caged for a full 8 days!  This was certainly a journey for me and my cage as my previous record was only 3 days in a metal cage which was torture!  This time I was wearing the Bondage Locker (bought on Amazon) and though in ‘Buzz Lightyear’ colours, it is very comfortable and I love the closeness during those night time woodies.  Now out, I must admit that my ball sack feels rather bruised, is that normal?  I am also missing the reminder that Mistress owns my ‘equipment’.
The Bondage Locker is still escapable and I was tempted several times… Ok I found a way to release a little tension, in so far as it wasn’t exactly pleasurable and actually just led to more tension, if you know what I mean.  This is why Mistress has instructed me to write, not for forgiveness, I’ve already done that and what a sour experience that was.  No, I am writing because the Bondage Locker has an attachment for a PA piercing.  My questions are about getting pierced:
1. In the current climate, how safe is it?
2. How long does it take to heal?
3. How do you ‘vet’ the piercers?  Do I come right out and say “How much experience have you of doing a PA piercing?” or is that just weird?
4. How uncomfortable is it wearing a cage with a PA attachment long term?
5. Those of you with the piercing, did it affect your libido at all?
I welcome your responses as Mistress is getting impatient with my indiscretions.”

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #6 on: February 03, 2021, 07:41:40 AM »
Why are men so stupid?  I have been married to my husband for 23 years and not once has he realised that I have made him do everything that I want him to do, when I want him to do it.  I’m not tall but I know how to use my body and he knows, simply from a particular look I give him, when I mean business.
So why did my child of a husband suggest trying a cage?  The silly puppy dog has been under my lock and key from day one of him seeing my, even if I do say so myself, well-shaped legs and butt.  When you are not tall and you are a woman, being the one in charge takes practice and, in my line of work, I have learned how to oversee a lot of puppy dogs and keep them in line.
When the lockdown came along, I thought that it would be a bit of a vacation from working with silly ‘boys’ and their infantile antics, but no!  Instead, I have been stuck in a house with a ‘grownup' child with too much time on his hands, access to the internet and a ready supply of bathroom breaks.
Take yesterday for instance.  I have an important job and need to be up early to prepare and get things in place.  I find that dressing business like helps to put me in the right mind set.  My job doesn’t lend itself to ‘hard core city business lady’ attire so over lockdown I am taking the opportunity to wear some rather tight skirts and blouses with buttons that are, shall we say, teasing.  You should have seen the look on husbands face when he came down in the morning, I thought his eyes were going to pop out but, having 3 wonderful children of our own, there was nothing he could do about it at that time.
After the children had gone into school and work, I caught him trying to take a ‘toilet a break’.  The noises were not normal noises and fortunately we have locks on the doors that prevent children getting stuck in the bathroom.  As ours were in school I didn’t hesitate to unlock the door.  The look of shame and guilt on his face!  Likewise, he must have seen the look of steel in my eyes as the apologies came fast and strong.
Ordering him to the bedroom and to lean over the frame of our rather sturdy and multifunctional bed, I distracted him from his indiscretion with 10 rapid swings of a riding crop; a riding crop that he bought I will add, fool!  Thinking that this was role play and his ship had come home, he then made a few suggestions.  I had my own and since he was rather exposed and going nowhere, did I mention that his hands were tied?  Oops, another one of his gadgets.😉  I then proceeded to lock him up.  He did squirm and complain that I pinched him a few times, so I pointed out that everything so far was his own doing.  I did add a twist.  My knicker drawer was open and there were a pair of incredibly uncomfortable red frilly thongs sticking out that he had bought ‘me’ last valentines.  Slipping those on to his pert arse was fun, a few quick strokes of the crop were even more fun but the 20-megapixel close up of his raw butt will remain with me for quite some time…unless I decide to share it with his friends that is.
He appeared to have a rather settled sleep last night, but I have some fun ideas that might leave him feeling a little drained tomorrow.
Men are so stupid!
Mistress Dominique

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2021, 07:13:12 AM »
So, a week on from his ‘caught in the act’ experience, hubby, or should I say ‘subby’, has been nicely locked up in his cage and is definitely starting to feel horny.  He currently has two cages and has been wearing his favourite plastic ‘Buzz Lightyear’ one for the week.  As a side note, I have ordered a third cage, from Amazon, which will be an interesting surprise for him but I will explain how that turns out once it arrives, hehe.  Last night, whilst watching TV, I gave him a choice: “You can have me, but you have to spend the night in your steampunk steel cage”.  He hates sleeping in this one as the night-time boners cause his balls to be choked and he never sleeps more than two hours in a row.  Surprisingly, there was no arguing and off he trotted to get his silver cage.  Once nicely locked in, and after inspection by yours truly, I commented on how silly and little his man-piece looked.  Ah, how to undermine my puppy-dogs self-image.  I suggested that taking one of the tanned pills was the only way that he was being let out to have me the next day!  Why should I not have fun too?
Before the silly boy could think it through, I was depositing the pill into his hand with a nice drink of water, which just happened to be on hand.  Those of you who use Cialis, or similar, will know that once you have a boner, it does not go away quickly: designed by a woman, for men to please woman!  Now imagine that boner whilst caged😊.  So, off we went to bed for an early night to be fully rested for tomorrows fun.  Still no arguments…
The next morning, I am pleased to say that subby had a very restless night and I am sure that there was a whimper during one very early hour in the morning.  I had a wonderful night’s sleep and though my poor old hubby had very read eyes, strained balls and a look of hope this morning, I rather enjoyed dashing his dreams with one stern look.  After a slightly worried enquiry as to my health, I explained in no uncertain words that waking me up every 2 hours had left me drained, grumpy and would be sleeping alone tonight to catch up on my beauty sleep.  I have never seen him pout before, but he came close at that point.  How I kept a straight face at that point I do not know, perhaps I should return to drama school.
So, what do you think, release him, or keep him caged for a little/lot/very lot longer?  I am worried that he will injure himself trying to relieve his tension if I don’t.  I welcome your views.
Loving my hubby- nominated role,
Mistress Dominique

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Offline Gamelover24

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Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #8 on: February 10, 2021, 01:38:28 AM »
So, a week on from his ‘caught in the act’ experience, hubby, or should I say ‘subby’, has been nicely locked up in his cage and is definitely starting to feel horny.  He currently has two cages and has been wearing his favourite plastic ‘Buzz Lightyear’ one for the week.  As a side note, I have ordered a third cage, from Amazon, which will be an interesting surprise for him but I will explain how that turns out once it arrives, hehe.  Last night, whilst watching TV, I gave him a choice: “You can have me, but you have to spend the night in your steampunk steel cage”.  He hates sleeping in this one as the night-time boners cause his balls to be choked and he never sleeps more than two hours in a row.  Surprisingly, there was no arguing and off he trotted to get his silver cage.  Once nicely locked in, and after inspection by yours truly, I commented on how silly and little his man-piece looked.  Ah, how to undermine my puppy-dogs self-image.  I suggested that taking one of the tanned pills was the only way that he was being let out to have me the next day!  Why should I not have fun too?
Before the silly boy could think it through, I was depositing the pill into his hand with a nice drink of water, which just happened to be on hand.  Those of you who use Cialis, or similar, will know that once you have a boner, it does not go away quickly: designed by a woman, for men to please woman!  Now imagine that boner whilst caged😊.  So, off we went to bed for an early night to be fully rested for tomorrows fun.  Still no arguments…
The next morning, I am pleased to say that subby had a very restless night and I am sure that there was a whimper during one very early hour in the morning.  I had a wonderful night’s sleep and though my poor old hubby had very read eyes, strained balls and a look of hope this morning, I rather enjoyed dashing his dreams with one stern look.  After a slightly worried enquiry as to my health, I explained in no uncertain words that waking me up every 2 hours had left me drained, grumpy and would be sleeping alone tonight to catch up on my beauty sleep.  I have never seen him pout before, but he came close at that point.  How I kept a straight face at that point I do not know, perhaps I should return to drama school.
So, what do you think, release him, or keep him caged for a little/lot/very lot longer?  I am worried that he will injure himself trying to relieve his tension if I don’t.  I welcome your views.
Loving my hubby- nominated role,
Mistress Dominique

I think you should definitely keep him locked for longer. He obviously needs to learn some respect if he actually pouted & whimpered throughout the night. Maybe continue with this form of punishment (since he obviously hated it) but make him sleep tied up in a different room so he doesn't bother you.

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #9 on: February 10, 2021, 08:15:17 AM »
Gamelover24, I love your line of thought and there must be a level of synergy here because that baby-cock is still behind bars; all be it small shiny ones.  I did consider making him sleep at the end of the bed, on a little dog blanket.  I even went as far as putting one there, with a gag (one of his other amazon orders) and cuffs, before he came back into the bedroom.  The look on his face when he came into the room, part fear, part excitement!  The requests for forgiveness, which turned into pleading, convinced me otherwise.  However, I have not yet put the dog bed away.  He did fidget a bit last night, but I know that he was working hard, hard being the operative word here, to not wake me.
I have one question, shall I let him put the ‘Buzz Lightyear’ cage back on as a gift for some service?  And if so, what should the service be?

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #10 on: February 18, 2021, 10:53:16 AM »
This episode of our chastity story is not the most exciting, but it does put my new relationship with my husband into context.  It might also be of interest to other woman with husbands in need of becoming submissive and handing over their ‘freedom’ to their strong wives/partners.
Previously, I asked the question “Why are men so stupid?”  I am now adding to this, “Why are men so lazy?” especially when they are horny?  For clarity, I am not talking about chores around the home, my subby-hubby has always been a bit anal about cleaning and tidying.  No, what I am talking about is being distracted by their horniness and not tidying up after themselves.  Let me explain…
A while back, before all of this Covid horridness and hubby asking to become my sub, we were away on a week’s family holiday.  It was a lovely winter break which meant long evenings in front of the fire reading books.  I’m a traditionalist, preferring paper books with a leaning towards cheap sexy novels.  Hubby, as you might have gathered, likes gadgets and tech’ so opted for a Kindle and has traditionally read non-fiction and very dull technical books.  He doesn’t read tonnes but this holiday his eyes were glued to the screen and was quite furtive when quizzed about what was so interesting: “Oh, you know dear, usual books to help with the job.” Soooooo boring!
Thinking back on it, it was about a month later that he started making different requests in the bedroom, such as denial, being ordered about and the occasional spanking.  I never, pardon the pun, read much into it.  I was ok with his requests as long as he fulfilled my needs.  It became apparent that the more I denied and got rough him, the more he would request next time he was horny.  His reading also increased, and I started to notice more payments being made for online books.
About 2 months ago and before chastity was on the table, I found an odd thing in the bathroom which resembled a small penis with two arms.  When I challenged him on it, he acted very vague and dismissive.  This then turned into defensiveness and an argument about laziness and “what if the kids had seen it.”  There was much apologising that night I can tell you!
I forgot about the black thing and then came across his Kindle which happened to be left on my side of the bed.  Curious, and because he is too lazy to put a password on it more complicated than 1234, I thought I would take a look at what he was reading. Wow! Now I know why he was so glued to the screen and was making these increasingly unusual bedroom requests.  There was book after book of female dominance, male chastity and slutty novels about wives reducing their sissy husbands to becoming cuckholds (a term that I had to look up).  There was one very interesting book called Taming the Caged Beast, which I recommend to any woman thinking of putting their husband into chastity, and has become my bible of leading this relationship.  Another book, called “Confessions of a Dominatrix”, has some interesting punishment ideas in and will crystalise for me in the future.
Rather than telling him that I now understood what his new reading genre had become, I put the Kindle back and filed some of the ideas away into the naughty part of my brain.  I am actually quite pleased that he has been lazy with his tech and toys as my creativity, mixed with some of the pretty far-fetched  fantasy ideas from his books, have manifested into some rather interesting actions which have brought me a level of satisfaction and my husband a new level of ‘tension’ and occasionally, discomfort😉  Of these I will talk about in more detail in my next posting and I will also elaborate upon the purchase that I made last month and arrived this week.
My lazy hubby still thinks that chastity was all his idea.  True, he started his journey by himself and he would have eventually perked up the courage to ask for me to take the dominant role.  In reality I used my manipulative skills to speed things up.  I remember well the look of happiness on his face during these decisive times and how I kept a straight face as I led the conversation towards me taking more control, is again testimony to my acting skills. 
To all woman: men are so easy to manipulate when they are horny: their brains shut down and they follow instructions without question!  This sometimes makes me laugh out loud, which I refuse to explain to hubby, much to his annoyance.  He describes a deep feeling of relaxation about being caged and for me, life is becoming simpler, more passionate, and certainly humorous!  I don’t consider myself to be a dominatrix, I don’t get a great kick out of causing pain, but I am certainly the boss and get profound satisfaction from making my submissive husband aware of that each day!
I would love to hear from other woman and their experiences.
Mistress Dominique

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #11 on: March 02, 2021, 05:01:48 PM »
A fortnight of impishness
Hello fellow dominants and, if you are interested, locked-away-subs.  I will admit that I rather enjoy using Chastikey as a chat room and for recording my FLR journey.  Judging by the number of views, I can surmise that some of you are also finding amusement in them too.  I am a little surprised that few people are willing to add their thoughts or advice, so please: be bold and share a thought, I won’t bite… other than my subby that is😉
I mentioned previously that I had made a purchase for my subby and this arrived a couple of weeks back.  It was a lovely shiny cage with a urethral catheter.  The idea came from seeing that subby had been researching ‘sounding’ (god knows why as it looks painful!) and there was also a chapter in one of his stories about a cage, similar to this, being used as a punishment to prevent “sneaking out”.  As I have explained, I do actually love my silly-subby and don’t really get a kick out of causing pain but there is no harm in a little impish fun now is there?
When the parcel arrived, we were just on our way out for the food shop.  I refused to explain to subby what it was, only that I would show him later that evening.  I even put it in a place where he would view it throughout the day, knowing full well that his overly active boyishness would be going crazy with anticipation.  Even whilst performing all of the safety checks and a thorough sterilisation, I still wouldn’t let him see.
After the kids had gone to bed, I went to the bedroom (or can I start to call it the playroom?) instructing him to follow me in 15minutes.  Donning a rather sexy steampunk corset that I had bought, dimming the lights and preparing the room for my pleasure, I was ready.  Never, not in his entire life, has subby been on time to anything but at 14mins59secs there was a light tap on the door and a quiet question of “Can I come in?”.  “Yes, but no further than 2 steps in and close the door firmly behind you.”
When he came in and saw me stood there, crop in hand and a steely stare, his eyes almost popped out of his head!  It was adorable and so difficult not to smile.  To cover this up I sternly instructed him to strip and kneel.  His eyes were also darting around the room and quickly he noticed the ropes on the bed and the new cage on his pillow.  I read somewhere that pace is everything and so, taking my time, I explained in great detail what the new cage was and why I had bought it.  The thought of no escape clearly bothered him but a quick flick of the crop stopped him from dwelling on it.
Instructing him onto the bed and as I tied his hands and ankles, I noticed that he was getting very aroused.  Was this going to be a problem?  I removed his favourite cage, no easy feat with the boner that he was starting to have, but even the pain that this caused seemed to please him.  Putting the new cage on was a new experience for me as all the other times I have made him do it.  Judging from some of the wincing caused by me getting his tackle through the ring, clearly I might need practice: is your scrotum really that sensitive?
The fun part was putting the catheter section in.  My husbands ‘sounding’ research helped me here and judging by the intake of breath as it slid in, he clearly had not gone any further than research!  I untied him and told him to stand for inspection.  I was rather pleased with the look, with his wrinkled scrotum and the shortness of the cage, his tackle looked rather like a grumpy old man.  He didn’t like the analogy, but the name will stick, much to my impish pleasure.
When I instructed him to parade around the room, I thought that he was going to lose control.  Clearly the rubbing in his japs-eye was very intense and it was starting to dawn on him that a prolonged amount of time caged in this cage was going to drive him insane with desire!
There is more to follow in this story…
I am fascinated to learn from you, with regard to this style of cage, as to the length of time that it can be worn, what the health risks really are and whether the sensitive effects lessen with time.  I’m also interested if longer catheters are more painful, fun or better at keeping the ‘old-man’ locked away.
Please share your knowledge, as I am still a fledgling, and I look forward to using it for fun.
Yours impishly,
Mistress Dominique

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Offline Wanx

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Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #12 on: March 03, 2021, 08:16:12 AM »
Your posts are a nice read.  :) Regarding sounding I have tried it and I enjoyed it, not something I will do every day but with precautions taken it can be good fun. With urethral cages I have no experiences and I am not sure if I will try it out. Getting something put there for longer periods of time isnt something I feel is healthy. I have read about this topic and there are different opinions about it, some say it is not healthy, others say its no problem and quite enjoyable. Maybe just try it out, be careful and write about the experience.  ;)

Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #13 on: March 03, 2021, 01:13:15 PM »
Thank you Wanx for your reply and encouraging feedback.  I hope that my next impish escapade also make for a good read ;)
Regarding your last comment, I might set Subby to writing about his experiences.  I know that it always makes him feel a little embarrassed and self-conscious talking in 'public' which is a good thing in my mind and gives me a little more hold over him.  His spelling and grammar are questionable which will mean some interesting consequences will be dished out!
Kind regards,
Mistress D

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Offline odslutpuppy

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Re: New to being a keyholder
« Reply #14 on: March 21, 2021, 04:27:34 AM »
Greetings Mistress D - have very much enjoyed your posts on the progress of your journey. :)

To add to what Wanx mentioned, the biggest issue that I am aware of when it comes to cages with urethral inserts is a) an increase in the possibility of urinary infections (which really takes the fun out of the whole process), and b) the urethral insert doesn't add much to the security of the ball trap device. Piercing, and subsequently locking the PA to the end of the cage is pretty much the only way to prevent escape. Keeping in mind that lack of escape does not preclude 'release' by other means.

Looking forward to hearing more about your journey.
Be careful what you wish for... you just may get it and not in the way you expected.